Life is short. Unless, of course, you’re hanging by your eyelids from two metal chains attached to a crane, waiting for help to arrive, in which case time tends to drag a bit.
Behind the corpse in the reservoir, behind the ghost on the links,
Behind the lady who dances and the man who madly drinks,
Under the look of fatigue, the attach of migraine and the sigh
There is always another story, there is more than meets the eye.
W. H. Auden, At Last the Secret is Out
What is a cellular phone?
An electronic communications device to which is affixed a blob of protoplasm that looks suspiciously like a human being but is in fact a mindless android programmed to respond to constant electronic stimulation masquerading as communication, where every message, no matter how trivial, is treated as urgent, and therefore becomes necessary to receive immediately. One usually finds cellular phones and their android accessories in such locations as cars, shopping malls and movie theaters. The androids are distinguished from real human beings by their blindness to all sensory data around them except the cellular message. This inspires great confidence when you’re driving next to one talking on a cell phone at eighty miles per hour.
In the end there doesn’t have to be anyone who understands you. There just has to be someone who wants to.
I believe everybody in the world should have guns. Citizens should have bazookas and rocket launchers too. I believe that all citizens should have their weapons of choice. However, I also believe that only I should have the ammunition. Because frankly, I wouldn’t trust the rest of the goobers with anything more dangerous than string.
Times have not become more violent. They have just become more televised. Does anyone think the Civil War was the least bit civil? If television had existed, you could be sure they would have been there to cover it, or maybe even participate in it.